Jay Colins Jay Colins

Lust & Sexuality

Purity isn’t perfection—it’s pursuit. And it starts with returning to the Father.

💔 The Struggle Is Real, But So Is Freedom

Lust doesn’t knock politely—it barges in.

It shows up late at night, in quiet scrolls, in unresolved wounds, in loneliness that feels too heavy to carry.

For many of us, the battle started early—before we even had words for it.

A stolen glance. A hidden addiction. A moment of compromise that turned into a cycle we couldn’t seem to break.

But here’s the truth: You are not your struggle.

And your sexuality was never meant to be a battlefield—it was meant to be a gift under the covering of God’s love, not a curse wrapped in shame.

🌿 From the Garden to the Grave: The War for Our Desire

In the beginning, there was no shame.

Man and woman were created for covenant.

Adam and Eve stood before each other—naked and unashamed—not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually, and relationally.

When the Bible says “Adam knew Eve,” the Hebrew word for knew (yada) isn’t about biology—it’s about intimacy.

Communion. Vulnerability. Union in the safety of God’s order.

But when sin entered, everything shifted.

They covered themselves. They hid—not just from each other, but from God.

Shame became a reality. Guilt, blame, and brokenness followed.

The knowledge of evil entered their minds—and with it, a distortion of what love, sex, and identity were ever meant to be.

This fracture birthed a power struggle between man and woman.

And as Scripture unfolds, we see it ripple across generations—homes broken, hearts divided, and love redefined outside of God’s covering.

🧬 Man, Woman, and the Wholeness of God’s Image

When God formed Adam from the dust, He declared that it wasn’t good for man to be alone.

But God didn’t make another man. He pulled something out of Adam—a part of him that was once whole but now needed to be restored.

From Adam’s side came Eve—not a duplicate, but a counterpart.

She was similar, yet distinct. Bone of his bone, flesh of his flesh—yet bearing features, emotions, and attributes Adam never possessed on his own.

Together, male and female reflect the full image of God—His strength and His nurture, His authority and His compassion, His justice and His gentleness.

“In the image of God He created them; male and female He created them.”

— Genesis 1:27

That’s why covenantal marriage between a man and a woman is not just tradition—it’s divine theology lived out in the flesh.

It tells the story of unity in difference.

Of wholeness through complement.

Of oneness without sameness.

So when we redefine love in a way that removes the distinctions between male and female—we don’t just challenge Scripture, we blur the image we were meant to reflect.

Same-sex attraction, though often rooted in real wounds or emotional needs, is a distortion of a deeper longing—a longing to be seen, affirmed, and connected.

But when that longing turns inward—man to man, woman to woman—it becomes a closed loop that can’t reflect the creative, covenantal image of God.

This isn’t about shame.

It’s about alignment.

Love without truth is sentiment.

Truth without love is harsh.

But love rooted in truth? That’s what sets us free.

📖 God’s Design Still Stands

Even in a world that rewrites definitions and rebrands desires, God’s original design has not changed.

It was never outdated. It was never oppressive.

It was always about love protected by truth, intimacy covered by covenant, and desire directed by devotion.

God didn’t create sex to be shameful—He made it sacred.

He designed it to be a reflection of something greater: Christ’s love for His bride.

A love that gives. A love that covers. A love that stays.

But love outside of God’s order always turns in on itself.

What was meant to unite becomes a weapon that divides.

What was meant to be mutual becomes manipulative.

What was meant to heal becomes something that hurts.

And yet—His design still stands.

The call to holiness isn’t a rejection of desire—it’s the redemption of it.

It’s the invitation to return.

To trust that God is not withholding something from you—He’s preparing something for you.

“This is the will of God—your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality.”

— 1 Thessalonians 4:3

God’s design is not about suppression.

It’s about freedom that doesn’t cost your soul.

🔍 What Lust Really Is

One day, the Lord asked me, “What do you think lust is?”

I said, “It’s a supercharged sexual desire.”

He said, “It’s even simpler—and more profound. Lust is the enemy’s perversion of your desire to be loved.”

That hit deep.

Because under every lustful thought, every quiet compromise, every moment of clicking or fantasizing or settling—there’s a wound.

A hunger.

A longing to be seen, known, held, pursued.

But when we try to satisfy that longing outside the arms of the Father, it warps into something hollow and shameful.

What God made to be sacred becomes secret.

What was designed for covenant becomes currency.

💭 You Might Be Wrestling With…

  • Secret pornography or masturbation cycles

  • Shame after sexual compromise or ongoing sin

  • Lustful thoughts or fantasies that feel uncontrollable

  • Same-sex attraction and inner confusion

  • The weight of past abuse or trauma

  • A desire for intimacy that never seems to lead to peace

  • Fear of being honest with anyone about what you’re carrying

If that’s you—you’re not weak.

You’re human.

And if no one has told you yet: God is not afraid of your struggle.

He doesn’t flinch.

He doesn’t shame.

He draws near—and when you invite Him into the fight, it’s no longer yours alone.

🕊️ Truth That Frees

  • You are not what you’ve done.

  • You are not what’s been done to you.

  • Your struggle is not your identity.

  • The presence of temptation is not the absence of salvation.

  • God’s grace doesn’t excuse sin—it empowers you to overcome it.

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to man. And God is faithful… He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”

— 1 Corinthians 10:13

You were never meant to fight this alone.

Confession breaks the cycle.

Community keeps the light on.

And the Holy Spirit gives strength you don’t have on your own.

📚 Curated Resources

These are teachings, tools, and testimonies that we’ve personally been blessed by—from leaders who walk the walk and teach with both truth and tenderness.

🎙️ Teachings & Sermons

  • “The War Within” – [Speaker Name]

  • “Breaking the Cycle of Lust” – [Speaker Name]

  • “Holiness in the Age of Compromise” – [Speaker Name]

📖 Books & Devotionals

  • Finally Free – Heath Lambert

  • The Purity Principle – Randy Alcorn

  • Live Dead Journal – Daily surrender and spiritual focus

🎧 Podcasts & Playlists

  • The Basement – “Let’s Talk About Porn & Freedom” – Tim Ross

  • John Bevere – Lust & Purity Series

  • Worship Playlist: “Pure Fire” (curated for prayer + consecration)

🛠️ Tools

  • Covenant Eyes / Accountable2You – Safe, Spirit-led accountability

  • Scripture Reading Plan: Psalms 51, Romans 6–8, 1 Thess 4, 1 Cor 6

  • Journal Prompts:

    • “Where did I first feel unseen?”

    • “What lie about love am I still believing?”

    • “What am I afraid would happen if I brought this into the light?”

🗝️ Final Word

If you feel stuck—God’s not done.

If you feel numb—He’s still pursuing.

If you feel disqualified—He’s still calling you son.

This isn’t just about behavior.

It’s about belonging.

And the way out isn’t by trying harder.

It’s by coming home.

“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.”

— Matthew 5:8

You weren’t made to survive sin.

You were made to live free.

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Identity & Sonship

You’ll never know who you are until you know whose you are.

📜 Obedience Begins with Identity

Before God gave Israel commandments, He gave them context:

“I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.”

— Exodus 20:2

Before the law, there was love.

Before expectation, there was rescue.

Before performance, there was belonging.

The first four commandments are all about your relationship with God—His uniqueness, His name, His holiness, His rest.

The remaining six are about how we treat others.

But the first four root us in identity: who God is, and who we are as His.

❌ When Identity Is Misaligned, Obedience Falls Apart

You can’t walk in holiness if you don’t know you’re His.

If you don’t know God as your Father,

you’ll serve another master.

And when you serve another master,

you’ll inevitably break the rest of the commandments.

  • You’ll chase affirmation from people (covet)

  • You’ll misuse truth to cover shame (bear false witness)

  • You’ll take what doesn’t belong to you (steal)

  • You’ll use others for pleasure or validation (commit adultery)

  • You’ll dishonor authority (parents, God, leadership)

Every outward sin is a sign of an internal identity crisis.

🔁 Religion vs. Relationship

Religion teaches performance.

The Gospel reveals the Father.

  • Religion says: Do more, try harder, earn your place.

  • The Gospel says: You belong—now live like it.

“We love Him because He first loved us.”

— 1 John 4:19

You’re not saved by works—but your life becomes a work of grace that reflects your salvation.

Behavior follows belonging.

When you know you’re a son, you’ll walk differently—not to prove something, but because you carry something.

🏠 The Prodigal Son: The Return of Identity

“While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and ran…”

— Luke 15:20

This isn’t just about rebellion—it’s about recognition.

The Father wasn’t surprised by his return—He was waiting for it.

The only way the Father could have seen the son from afar is if He had been looking every day.

He didn’t say, Where have you been?

He said, Bring the robe, the ring, the sandals—restore my son.

God doesn’t just forgive you—He restores you to your name.

He doesn’t make you work your way back—He runs to meet you.

🧬 The Spirit of Adoption vs. The Orphan Spirit

“You did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but the Spirit of adoption… by whom we cry, ‘Abba, Father.’”

— Romans 8:15

The Spirit of Adoption says:

  • I belong here.

  • I am loved without condition.

  • I serve from acceptance, not for it.

  • My identity is secure—even when I fall.

The Orphan Spirit says:

  • I have to earn my worth.

  • I’m tolerated, not treasured.

  • I compete for love.

  • I hide when I fail.

Orphan-hearted believers live like spiritual freelancers—saved but striving.

But God didn’t send His Son just to forgive you.

He sent Him to bring you home.

💭 Signs of an Identity / Rejection Issue

  • Constantly comparing yourself to others

  • Struggling to receive love or compliments

  • Always needing to prove your value

  • Isolation or avoiding community

  • Fear of failure or rejection

  • Seeking validation through achievement, relationships, or image

  • Feeling spiritually “less than” or overlooked

  • Oscillating between pride and insecurity

These are not personality quirks.

They’re wounds crying out for truth.

And truth is found in the Father’s voice.

🛑 Misplaced Identity Leads to Idolatry

If you don’t know who you are, you’ll spend your life trying to become someone else.

And whatever you turn to for identity, worth, or affirmation—becomes your master.

“Without knowing our identity, by our nature we will seek to find our identity in something else. Whatever that thing is, it will become an idol—our master. And any master other than Jesus will leave us in bondage to that object.”

  • If you find your identity in approval, you’ll be ruled by rejection.

  • If you find your identity in performance, you’ll be crushed by failure.

  • If you find your identity in pleasure, you’ll be enslaved by addiction.

  • If you find your identity in relationships, you’ll compromise to be accepted.

We weren’t created to be defined by what we do, how we feel, or who we impress—we were made to be known by the One who formed us.

“The one the Son sets free is free indeed.”

— John 8:36

🕊️ Truth That Anchors

  • You are not what happened to you

  • You are not what you’ve done

  • You are not what others said about you

  • You are not the lie you believed

You are a son—adopted, chosen, covered.

You’re not working for a seat at the table. You already have one.

And the same voice that spoke over Jesus speaks over you:

“This is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased.”

📚 Curated Resources


🎙️ Teachings & Sermons

  • “From Orphan Spirit to Sonship” – [Speaker Name]

  • “The Father’s Blessing” – [Speaker Name]

  • “Who Told You That?” – Identity series

📖 Books

  • Abba’s Child – Brennan Manning

  • Victory Over the Darkness – Neil T. Anderson

  • Spiritual Slavery to Spiritual Sonship – Jack Frost

🎧 Podcasts & Media

  • Sonship & Identity Series – Messenger Podcast

  • The Basement: “You’re Not What You Did” – Tim Ross

  • Worship/Spoken Word Playlist – “He Calls Me Son”

🛠️ Tools & Practices

  • Daily identity declarations (based on Scripture)

  • Scripture meditation: Romans 8, Galatians 4, Ephesians 1–2

  • Journal Prompts:

    • “When did I first feel like I had to earn love?”

    • “Who taught me what love looks like—and did they get it right?”

    • “Where am I still living like an orphan?”

🗝️ Final Word

You don’t become a son by fixing your behavior.

You become a son by receiving the love that never stopped pursuing you.

And once you know who you are—

You’ll stop chasing scraps.

You’ll stop running.

You’ll stop performing.

“You are no longer a slave, but a son. And if a son, then an heir through God.”

— Galatians 4:7

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Prayer & Intimacy with God

It all begins with an idea.

You weren’t made for performance. You were made for presence.

🌿 From Duty to Delight

For many believers, prayer feels like a discipline—a box to check, a way to “be a good Christian.”

But prayer isn’t supposed to be a task—it’s a conversation with the Father.

Jesus didn’t teach His disciples how to preach or how to perform miracles—He taught them how to pray.

Why?

Because everything flows from intimacy.

Authority, clarity, holiness, freedom—it’s all sustained by relationship, not routine.

💡 What Prayer Actually Is

  • It’s not just talking—it’s abiding

  • It’s not a monologue—it’s mutual knowing

  • It’s not a formula—it’s fellowship

  • It’s not where you impress God—it’s where you’re impressed by Him

Prayer isn’t for people who “have it all together”—it’s where people go to get real, get free, and get filled.

“But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret…”

— Matthew 6:6

God hides in the secret place not to be distant—but to draw you away from distractions.

He wants you—not your performance, your eloquence, or your works.

🔥 Intimacy Fuels Everything

When you truly encounter God’s presence, you don’t need hype to keep going.

You don’t need rules to stay pure.

You don’t need applause to stay faithful.

Because you’re not living for God from a distance—you’re walking with God in closeness.

  • Moses was marked by the glory of God because he spoke to Him as a friend.

  • David wrote Psalms not out of head knowledge—but from hours in God’s presence.

  • Jesus Himself regularly withdrew to pray—not as a model only, but because He longed for communion with the Father.

🚨 Signs You May Be Disconnected from Intimacy

  • You pray only when you need something

  • You don’t feel peace when you’re alone

  • You’re more drawn to Christian activity than Christ Himself

  • You confuse knowledge about God with knowing God

  • You feel like God is distant or uninterested

  • You feel dry spiritually but don’t know how to reconnect

🕊️ Truth That Restores Intimacy

  • God isn’t ignoring you—He’s inviting you

  • You don’t have to clean yourself up to come close

  • Prayer isn’t about being impressive—it’s about being available

  • He’s not disappointed in your silence—He’s waiting in it

  • When you slow down and show up, He always speaks

📚 Curated Resources

🎙️ Teachings & Sermons

  • “The Secret Place” – Eric Gilmour

  • “How to Hear God’s Voice” – John Bevere

  • “Intimacy with God” – Corey Russell

📖 Books & Devotionals

  • Practicing the Presence of God – Brother Lawrence

  • Secrets of the Secret Place – Bob Sorge

  • Draw the Circle – Mark Batterson

🎧 Podcasts & Playlists

  • “Praying in the Spirit” – Tim Sheets

  • Intimacy with God series – Upperroom Podcast

  • Worship Playlist – “Altar & Oil” (curated for prayer)

🛠️ Tools & Practices

  • Set a recurring “meeting” with God: same time, no agenda

  • Use a journal to pray raw and honestly

  • Daily reading:

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Leadership & Calling

It all begins with an idea.

Discovering your assignment. Walking in spiritual authority. Leading like Christ.

This topic will cover:

  • The difference between natural ambition and Kingdom calling

  • Biblical models of leadership (Jesus, David, Paul)

  • Leading from servanthood, not self-promotion

  • Walking in your anointing with character to sustain it

  • The importance of faithfulness in hidden seasons

  • Misconceptions around “calling” (not just platform or position)

  • Dangers of chasing affirmation instead of alignment

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Freedom & Deliverance

It all begins with an idea.

Jesus didn’t just forgive you—He came to set you free.

This section will dive into:

  • What biblical deliverance actually is (not hype, but holy)

  • The difference between salvation, healing, and deliverance

  • Common signs of spiritual bondage or oppression

  • How believers can still be bound in areas of their soul

  • The role of repentance, authority, and the Holy Spirit in freedom

  • Misunderstandings and abuses of deliverance ministry

  • Freedom as a lifestyle, not just a one-time event

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Discernment & Deception

It all begins with an idea.

Truth is clarity. Discernment is protection.

This section would cover:

  • How New Age teachings have infiltrated Christian language (manifestation, energy, the “universe,” etc.)

  • The difference between biblical faith and law of attraction

  • What true discernment looks like (not suspicion, but Spirit-led clarity)

  • The danger of “Christianized” witchcraft (vision boards, crystals, sage, etc.)

  • The role of the Holy Spirit as the Spirit of Truth

  • How to test the spirits and spot deception (1 John 4, Matthew 24)

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